‘He’s not his parent, but we wanted Leo to be able to reach out with questions when he’s older, which he was happy with.’ ‘We sent him pictures of Leo as a newborn, and have shared a few emails, but ultimately, he’s not a part of our son’s life, which is what we all wanted,’ says Jessica. While they would have liked to have used the same donor again, he now lives abroad. She and her wife Vicky, 42, have recently returned to Facebook in the hopes of finding a donor for a second child. Jessica, 39, from Norfolk, has a four-year-old son Leo, conceived through an online donor. ‘The bare minimum we would like is that when our kid is of age that they at least get to reach out and talk to the donor at least once.’
‘It was extremely important for me to know where I came from,’ she explains. She and her wife Klara, 27, consider it vital that their child can contact their donor in the future, and says the biggest challenge has been ‘finding someone we have a connection with and who we can genuinely trust’. Michelle, 33, from Chicago, is one of the women taking to Facebook groups to find a sperm donor. However, the recipient parents are not privy to such information.
This extends to the donor’s full name and address when the child turns 18. Since 1 April 2005, people conceived via a sperm, egg or embryo donation thereafter have been legally entitled to access their donor’s information after turning 16, including their physical description and the year and country of their birth. Heterosexual couples must try conceiving naturally for two years or have undergone 12 rounds of IUI.įinding a donor online is faster, simpler and the recipient gets to meet the donor – but of course, it comes with its own risks. This route also ensures thorough STD and health screenings – but it comes with one major drawback: the cost.įor a lesbian couple to be offered Intrauterine Insemination (IUI) – treated semen inserted directly into the womb – on the NHS, they must have first undergone six unsuccessful rounds of IUI, costing £1,600 a squirt. However, if recipients go through a Human Fertilization and Embryology Authority (HFEA) licenced fertility clinic, legislation states that the donor is completely absolved of any parental or financial obligations. Fertility law specialists Natalie Gamble Associates, (NGA) explain: ‘A sperm donor who donates through sexual intercourse (sometimes called “natural insemination”) is always the legal father of any child conceived, irrespective of what the parents agree or what is recorded on the birth certificate.’ Please pm me so we can sort out what each other’s expectations and wishes are.’įactors such as the mother’s relationship status and the insemination method could land the donor with legal obligations. ‘White male (tall if possible lol) new to all this but I’m 25 and single. Any donors Yorkshire area?,’ one post from a single woman reads. While lesbian couples are by far the largest recipient group, there are also plenty of single women and some heterosexual couples struggling to conceive, who take to the group to find the semen they need. Thank you for looking or considering us!’ We will pay for your travel! We welcome all ethnicities. We would prefer the donor to have absolutely no contact with the child very minimal updates if that’s okay. Recipients’ posts tend to be more detailed, including wedding photos, family snaps and information about finances.Ī typical request from someone seeking sperm says: ‘Hi me and my wife are looking for a donor (no NI please) we don’t drink or smoke we have our own house and both work full time. These are Artificial Insemination (syringe/turkey-baster), Partial Natural Insemination (masturbating and climaxing inside the recipient) and Natural Insemination (having penetrative sex). The different acronyms stand for various fertilisation methods. Men offer up their sperm donation services through Facebook groups